OMG OMG OMG. I can't believe 2009 is almost over.

Whattayear. Of course my affair with 2009 wasn't as dramatic as others' were, but dayum, 2009, para kang boyfriend na gago.

The start of it was full of waiting, teasing. There was the wait for the LAE results, the NMAT results, the short list of PGH interviewees, and the final qualifiers. I was also building my resume on the side, just in case. The happiest month has to be February, my birth month and the month almost all the results came out. I decided 2009 was my year.

March was of course, bittersweet. Ay wait, April ata yun. Anyway, graduation was bittersweet. I had the best summer vacation. I was also fattest during this time. wtf.

June onwards, naging gago na. Med school is a pain for the most part, because it's so different from what I've gotten used to in Diliman. It got better though. It's like a stubbornly erect tag on the inside of your shirt. It shouldn't cause too much suffering once you get desensitized, which happens eventually. What's really painful is missing the old days, which until now, I still feel. I don't know if I'll ever get over it.

However, true to the gagong-boyfriend-na-hindi-mahiwalayan imagery, it had some redeeming moments. I can't think of any right now, but I'm sure there's a whole lot of them.

K wala 'tong kwenta. Just keeping memories on file.

2010, please be consistently good. Consistency is key, k?

I've tried and failed on this a few years ago, but I'll give it another shot. For reasons obvious to those who know me a little better than my neighbors do, I think I'm more disciplined now.

2010 will see a nicer Julie. Significantly nicer, enough for people to notice. :)

Disclaimer: Sincerity not guaranteed. A 21 year old can hardly be expected to just change their attitude with no elaborate argumentation.

Deadlines have never been so deadly. Hi Kat! We're dead.

Anyway, I'm free of load. I'm free to do anything, but more importantly, I'm free to do nothing. :)

So right now, at 10:27 am, I'm at the condo, instead of in class where any med student should be at the hour, printing and reproducing stuff, before I stick a toothpick into each of the six pebble coated slabs of garden foam back at Karlate's unit. Don't worry your presumptuous little mind, that wasn't supposed to make sense.

Again, quickly, CONGRATULATIONS PUGAD! That was an awesome homecoming. I love you, all ten years worth of people you! I hope that in another ten years, we'll all still be there, taking pictures with Kuya Collins, and sandwiched between the Bucus. XOXO x XXX to the Xth!

TRP. I am so proud of 2014 and Phi Lambda Delta (I think this is the first time I ever mentioned my sorority here. And yeah, I'm in a sorority now). All the hours, effort and joint pain paid off LOTS. Now I understand what the big deal is (I was seriously cursing at the whole idea of TRP days before). It's FUN. Can't wait for next year!

I have a goal. Which I also strategically convinced my superefficientsupersmart seatmate to make his own, to increase the possibility of achieving it.

Congrats PUGAD! I feel so bad about not being involved in the Alumni Homecoming preparations. I promised I'd make time and I was sure I'd be able to. I didn't expect to be this deep in duties so early in my med career. Sorry! Babawi ako ng bonggang big time sa lahat.

In the 1999 teen movie Jawbreaker, Courtney and Marcie told Julie to "Learn it. Live it. Love it."

Haha. 1999 teen.

I love being at home with nothing to do. I love being in Diliman with nothing to do, too. In fact, I love being anywhere with nothing to do except Manila. I can't wait to not hate Manila so much. I have a feeling the time is coming soon. :)

After going through countless drowsy mornings and sleepless nights, twenty pounds of readings, lots of money, four boxes of Nescafe 3-in-1, (I forget how many) bottles of Redbull, half a year off my life's worth of nicotine, eight  highlighters and a tube of mascara (and zero final exams, yahu!), I'm done with the first sem of med school.

I didn't quit!

This is what I get for being sofuckingwitty. Ako na'ng na-usog.

Still, it's the funniest thing ever. Tetralogy of Faillot.

Btw, I almost ticked one off my list of odd procurables. Banker's lamp! But the only one left had bubbles on the shade. Not perfect. Won't do. 'til next time!

Muntik na. Thisclose. Busog na busog na 'ko sa pride. Pwedeng tumigil na kakakain? Pero parang ang dali nalang niya gawin. Gluttony.

You were the first of my many gay crushes. Thank you.

Dahil mas masarap mag-invest sa pwedeng i-harvest.

Relief goods ka ba? Gusto kita i-pack eh.

HAHAHAHAHA. I DIED.

Edit: I think I found my HUGE SACK OF RICE. Or my box of Ligo. OMG. LIGO. Only a true packer can understand the joy of packing and re-packing Ligo. I miss you Elora.

On Bandila tonight:

Reporter: Ano bang gusto mo 'pag laki mo?
Carlo (nasalantang bata): Pulis po
Reporter: Ah, pulis? Bakit naman?
Carlo: Para po makatulong sa magnanakaw.

Ok, I know Carlo meant to say an entirely different thing, pero natawa 'ko.

I'm scared. This Pepeng, I'm starting to believe PAGASA. The ants are in a panic. I've been killing ants with a piece of cardboard for fifteen minutes now.

Because I have this vague childhood memory of hearing a Church official defend accepting donations from corrupt officials (or was it gambling money? Can't remember, vague memory nga eh) by saying that Jesus said that it's ok to accept donation even from the devil himself if it is for the benefit of the needy, I try not to consider ulterior motives in the relief ops for Ondoy. I myself went there to ease the guilt of not doing anything, not out of pure altruism. However, one cannot be expected to not get annoyed by people declaring done and will-be-done good deeds on fb and ym, if one is constantly online to check fb and ym (one AKA ako). But, like Jesus supposedly said, it's ok. This is specially true now, with that Ondoy leaving our nation all tattered and torn. Action excuses intention these days, and that should be ok. I mean, us flawed need some reinforcement to keep us going. Sabi sa Psych (dahil hindi BS ang BS ko), kahit social reinforcement (in the form of imagined affirmation), ubra na. And that's ok. God I hope I can make myself more patient.

Pero teka, yung pagpropromote ng movie by saving your co-star (and your co-star alone, nevermind the fact that a baby, a 70-year old man two houses away, and a few more can fit your fucking speedboat), tangnangyun. Shameless plugging has never been so shameless.

Like I said a year ago, I fucking hate the Gutierrezes.

We finally got our phone line and internet back so now I'm a little less lost as to what's been going on with my friends down where it floods. For those I can't reach yet, I super pray to God they're fine, just impossible to contact right now (omg Aleya, papatayin kita kung ayaw mo lang pala magreply at sumagot).

Please God, unclog the drainage we humans have skillfully plugged with our candy wrappers, and let our asphalt suck in the water your trees would've readily absorbed hadn't Bayani decided to pluck them out of Katipunan.

For posterity :)

Today, I saw my first med failure. FML.

Thank God for stupid and all too familiar movies like Sorority Row, and my TV shows that are all back on the same day. I'm feeling better already, and all the psychoactive joy I had to indulge myself with was a cig.

PS Seriously, a little consistency please. Labumo.
PPS I miss my friends back in Dil. AKA the ones I'll see this Friday if things don't get fd up. AKA the ones I'll eat cake with if a certain test turns up negers. AKA kinuhanan ko ng AKA and my favorite newly whipped.

I feel stuck and out of options. Which is being stupid and ungrateful, 'cause I kindovalmostalways get what I want. It's just that now, there's not a dangling sparkly thing at the end of the room to reach out for. I'm motionless.

OK AKO NA EMO. HAHAHA.

And to Lil Sis. That cake will be ours to take. You've no idea how much I love ***b**y *h***r*. I think two other people will get this one. Oh morals, where in this long, bumpy, potholey journey have I neglected to strap you in? Come after me! Ornat.

Btw, I hate robots. They're smart, efficient, focused and useless without electricity.

And I love 500 Days of Summer. I know, not something I'd usually go for, but hey, I also wear flats now.

Congrats to everyone who had a great weekend, but a special shoutout to those she who had a specially special weekend. I think you know who you are. :)

R10t was awesome! Congrats PUGAD! Happy happy birthday! I hear big money was raked in, so congratulations to our beneficiary too!

Ok, now it feels like December 26. Huhu.

PS. Lord, kung hindi abuso, paki lang yung 205 ko. And thanks for last time :)

Walang pasok sa Lunes! Oh my God, binigay Mo talaga. We were all so busy preparing for Lady Med (and celebrating, too) that we almost (of course, we can't completely) ignored the big, high mortality Biochem exam on Monday. But no, no Monday. No Biochem!

Because of the unexpected and very welcome holiday, I have time to watch Crime Investigation, and yeah, it's still on. It's scary how smart murderers can be. There's this one where a funeral home owner  hired a guy to be his errand boy, intending to kill him eventually. The plan was to buy insurance policies for Errand Boy with him, his wife and two of his employees as beneficiaries. They murdered Errand Boy and tried (and obviously failed) to make it look like an accident. They were gonna get a total of $980,000 from the 9 insurance policies on Errand Boy. It's like the Witch fattening Hansel and Gretel up with sweets so she can eat them. Or like farmers, with pigs, for the porkchop I'm having right now. Anyway, basta kadiri okay. Funeral home owner wasn't fictional like the Witch, nor Errand Boy delicious like my porkchop. Izwrong.